And then later... we had more discussions... on how to combine our awesomeness:
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
My furst Turkey furiend - da Bocephus.
I met my very furst Turkey furiend on da Facebooks. It iz da Marvin's brother, Bocephus. And I like him. Because of his handsomeness and awesomeness. And also, here is our conversation... for you to enjoys. But furst, I will post his picture - you can see da Marvin in da background... in awe of his handsomeness:
And then later... we had more discussions... on how to combine our awesomeness:
And then later... we had more discussions... on how to combine our awesomeness:
Sunday, March 11, 2012
I will not stand for this...
They think they can just steal an hour of my sleep?? Who made them the king of sleepies? I am on da protest. Occupy da bed movement is on!
Friday, March 9, 2012
The Conspiracy of the Bigness - Part 2
If you read da Part 1 - you already knows the question, if you did not, here it is:
MichelleDawn asks: I want to know when you first discovered the conspiracy of the bigness and how you plan to fight it.
Part 2 is to explain how I plan to fight it. I think furst I should tell you my current plans I've made and how they have gone.
Plan A- train the Red man to abandon the conspiracy of the bigness and helps me instead. The Red, he is easy to trick into helping you. I think this is how da Bertha got him to cross over to the dark side. He is also not very good at following plans. At furst, we had a victory, when he successfully blocked da Bertha out of the kitchen... it was glorious! Here is da Bertha after her defeat:
MichelleDawn asks: I want to know when you first discovered the conspiracy of the bigness and how you plan to fight it.
Part 2 is to explain how I plan to fight it. I think furst I should tell you my current plans I've made and how they have gone.
Plan A- train the Red man to abandon the conspiracy of the bigness and helps me instead. The Red, he is easy to trick into helping you. I think this is how da Bertha got him to cross over to the dark side. He is also not very good at following plans. At furst, we had a victory, when he successfully blocked da Bertha out of the kitchen... it was glorious! Here is da Bertha after her defeat:
But soon, da Red seemed to be taking over the man cave a bit too often and I suspect he has rejoined the army of bigness:
This took me to plan B. Plan B was to hire a guard for da man cave. I hired da Fatty, because he is my BFF and I trust him. As it turns out, he is not very good at da guarding duties. Below is Fatty on the job and the man cave later that day:
This brings us to my new plan, Plan Get da Bertha out of da Man Cave now. I decided to consult a specialist. I contacted my furiends at Hammer Out Animal Cruelty and asked:
So - you may know about my sister da Bertha trying to take over my man cave. She is built like a sumo wrestler. If you had a sumo wrestler trying to take over your locker room - how would you deal with this issue? Thank you for your advice.
They told me: Well we have found that distraction works best when taking on fighters of Sumo
backgrounds. To throw them off there game plan, so to say. To defeat Bertha we would suggest putting a treat on a string or fishing pole. When Bertha get close to the entrance of the cave, you simply lure her into another room with the treat. Let us know if this works out for you.
I tried a small version of dis plan today. Bertha was in da man cave - mom brought out treats, when da Bertha went in the kitchen, I took the man cave over and had my treats delivered to da man cave. It was successful. Part 2 of this plan is to lure da Bertha into a shipping container with a couch and have one of those wide load trucks drive her to da California to live with da Marvin. I will keep you posted on my progress.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Blogging on the move
I have discovered I can blog on da mobile. To test this feature- I am blogging- while on da road. To illustrate why I need this feature- I will include pics of me on the move:
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Da Facebooks Timeline - what da heck is going on?
Marvin suggested I address dis - and also - I am a bit confused myself. And I am very wise, so I am concerned, by dis confusion.
Da Facebooks sent us a message today saying convert to Timeline or else we will make you anyway. Dis was a most unpleasant message to wake up to. So I had to consider whether I would revolt against da Facebooks or do their bidding.
I consulted my furiends. Da Juno, my girlyfuriend, had already switched and encouraged me to do dis too. And also, da Marvin switched, but dat was on accident and due to lack of caffeine in da morning.
I tooks a vote on my page and switched because da people had spoken and wanted to see me on timeline.
Here are the good things...
1- I can receive messages from my furiends - at anytime... just send me a message.
2- I can send messages to other pages. Just today I messaged Marvin to tell him I am more awesome. Dis is obviously a very useful feature.
3- I can make a big picture and a little picture of me. Or maybe a big picture made up of many little pictures of me and a little picture - the possibilities are endless, but it means a lot more me.
Now dis is all new and very confusings, but we will make it through together. Here is my big picture of handsomeness featuring da Wilson Potter, da beautifuls Juno, me, and da Pig (she is in da time outs for her stealing problem). So dis is part of da awesomeness of my new layout... please bear wit me as I get used to it.
Da Facebooks sent us a message today saying convert to Timeline or else we will make you anyway. Dis was a most unpleasant message to wake up to. So I had to consider whether I would revolt against da Facebooks or do their bidding.
I consulted my furiends. Da Juno, my girlyfuriend, had already switched and encouraged me to do dis too. And also, da Marvin switched, but dat was on accident and due to lack of caffeine in da morning.
I tooks a vote on my page and switched because da people had spoken and wanted to see me on timeline.
Here are the good things...
1- I can receive messages from my furiends - at anytime... just send me a message.
2- I can send messages to other pages. Just today I messaged Marvin to tell him I am more awesome. Dis is obviously a very useful feature.
3- I can make a big picture and a little picture of me. Or maybe a big picture made up of many little pictures of me and a little picture - the possibilities are endless, but it means a lot more me.
Now dis is all new and very confusings, but we will make it through together. Here is my big picture of handsomeness featuring da Wilson Potter, da beautifuls Juno, me, and da Pig (she is in da time outs for her stealing problem). So dis is part of da awesomeness of my new layout... please bear wit me as I get used to it.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
The Conspiracy of the Bigness - Part 1
MichelleDawn asks:
I want to know when you first discovered the conspiracy of the bigness and how you plan to fight it.
This is a two part question - today I will answer about discovering da conspiracy of da bigness. Furst, you must understand, when I furst came home, I was skinny and itchy and missing da furs. I was also heartworm positive. So... da mom made sure dat I was comfortable and the other dogs didn't bothers me. So I had comfortable accommodations and me and da Fatty hung out a lot. We were around da other dogs, but dey made sure we had our spots and dat we were comfortable and stayed calm through da heartworm treatment.
Then... I started felling betters. Dis is my before and after pic... once I started looking like da after, I wasn't being kept as calm, so I was out and about wit da other dogs more.... and dat is when it began..
I noticed da Bertha would do things, like block da ramp to da deck so I coulds not get in da house or yard:
Then, she started lording over my man cave with her bigness.. and uniting with other big dogs to form road blocks:
In da final blow - she invaded my most sacred place, da man cave and traumatized my rememory foam bed:
Stay tuned for my next blog post on how I plan to fight da conspiracy of da bigness!
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